A web-series like no other, this 80's sitcom knock-off asks the audience to imagine a parallel universe inhabited by anthropomorphic sex toys. Now meet the Dildos, a typical all-American family dealing with all the trials and tribulations of normal family life... with a twist.
Mom, Dad, Jr. and the Twins
"The Dildos works by taking a familiar setting—the family sit-com—and giving it a fresh twist with dildos. The situations, characters, and themes come across well due to the crisp writing and staging, supported by the colorful sets and clever anthropomorphizing of the dildos with hair, eyes, and wardrobe. On its own terms, The Dildos simply works."
- Jacques Haitkin
Cinematographer and Scary Cow Judge
Episode 1 is now streaming for free on Pixquid!
About The Dildos
The Dildos are a charming average American family (think the Cosby’s meets the Simpsons) with one unique caveat: they all happen to be dildos and all their friends happen to be sex toys.
Yes, actual real-life sex toys: dildos, vibrators, flesh lights, nipple clamps, Hitachi wands, and more.
In their world, which occasionally intersects the human world, they encounter conflicts similar to their human counterparts but, due to their nature, handle things a bit differently. These inanimate objects all come to life in this outrageous and unique comedy, which forces us to look at ourselves in a whole new way… and laugh!
The Dildos Show web series revolves around the trials and tribulations faced by a particularly entertaining family, which consists of Mr. Dildo, a mild-mannered gynecologist, Mrs. Dildo, a loving but slightly neurotic substitute teacher, Jr., the rebellious teen, Cindy and Mindy, the smart-ass catholic school girl twins, and Quake, their pet vibrating egg. Other supporting characters are Bobby Buttplug, the somewhat awkward little neighbor boy, his unconventional parents, Butch and Sally, and Father Foreplay, the imposing but gentle purveyor of rationality.
The Dildos is written as a succession of series, which consists of four 3-5 minute episodes. Each series revolves around a key theme or issue, which gets resolved by the end of the 4 episodes. There is a narrator, played by a fleshlight, which pops in at the end of each episode and provides a teaser sneak peek at what is to come.
The Dildos is a comedy like no other. The absurdity of the characters makes laughter inevitable, but the wit and intelligence of the scripts make it true comedy. It is witty, well-written, and unique, using absurdist humor and innuendo in order to make us look at society from an entirely different lens, and it allows us to laugh at what we see.
Thanksgiving shenanigans
The Characters
The Characters
The Characters
Mr. Dildo
This slightly larger-than-average Dildo is a cross between Jim Anderson (from Father Knows Best) and Homer Simpson. He is goofy but lovable, intelligent but unequipped to deal with all that his complicated family throws at him. He is 45 years old, works as a Gynecologist, has a comb-over, and is often portrayed wearing a tie.
Mrs. Dildo
She's lighter and smaller than Mr. Dildo. She is also 45. She is stuck somewhere between a 1950's housewife and a modern-day mom. She starts as a full-time, stay-at-home mom, but eventually takes a job as a substitute teacher to make ends meet. She is often seen cooking. She has blond, well-coiffed hair and is the only character that has arms.
Junior Dildo
Being your typical rebellious teenager at age 17, he is always pushing the boundaries. He is still searching for and defining his identity and thus changes his hairstyle and manner of dress often. He is about the same height as Mrs. Dildo but skinnier.
The twins
Cindy and Mindy are the opposite ends of a double dong permanently in a U shape. They are mostly seen in their Catholic schoolgirl outfits. The twins are 13, but intelligent and knowledgeable beyond their years. The twins are truly snarky and provide a lot of humor with their offbeat, offhand, non PC comments.
Quake
The Dildos' beloved pet is a vibrating egg.
Bobby
The son of the next-door neighbors is a buttplug. He is an odd and quirky 11-year-old, the kid no one really likes, but everyone tolerates.
Butch
The next-door neighbor and adoptive parent of Bobby is a short, thick dildo with short spiky hair and a leather jacket. There is much confusion over her gender at first. She is the “Pat” of the dildo world. Eventually, it is revealed that she is a dyke. She is 37, rough around the edges with a heart of gold and very protective of her wife, Sally.
Sally
She is the Dildo equivalent of a Blond bombshell and is permanently of the age 29. A beautiful, curvy, slender glass dildo has long blond hair and big eyelashes. She is married to Butch and Bobby's maternal parent.
Father Foreplay
This formidable but gentle character is the DIldos "go-to" guy for resolving tricky parenting issues. He is large and dark and wears flowing autentaious robes. The twins are in awe of him.
The Narrator
A Fleshlight, rather than a dildo, pops in at the end of each scene to announce the teaser for the next episode.